So Apocalyptic

Let us run a thought experiment in which everything Evangelicals believe is actually true. Now let’s all set our secret decoder rings, aka The Book of Revelation, to see how this crazy world will all turn out. For those unfamiliar … Continued


The Rant briefly considered a shutdown, but then the bartender quickly caved to our demands for an old-fashioned. That’s the real art of the deal. Know what to ask for and where to ask for it and win every time. … Continued

Third Rant from the Sun

The Rant would like to remind you the Earth does not care one jot or tittle about our existence. Because the Earth abides, dude. Easy come, easy go. The dinosaurs thought they were all that, too. Unless Captain Orange and … Continued

Rant Reborn

The Rant observes: The head ref for the PlayStation-What-Happened-to-our-Tostitos Fiesta Bowl was whiter than a Mormon potluck. And we’re back, baby! Let’s not get all weepy or hurl accusations about our absence. The Rant has to maintain a certain level … Continued

Three in the Evening

after Richard Brautigan   I’m sitting at the cigar bar, drinking a low carb beer. My ex is lounging in the pit, whispering to another man. So I shout on my way out, “Oh, for heaven’s sake!” Opposites always add … Continued

Welcome to America

His wife said           Baby, are we gonna be okay See Your drastic determination To protect your ideology Led to the separation Of this man’s family His daughter said           Daddy, why … Continued


She came to play And she came to win it I matched her play Not knowing she been it Then it Occurred to her When it Occurred to me That she Been it been it Then it Went left for … Continued

Magic Rant

The Rant would like to know why all World Cup soccer teams appear to have left their day jobs as male models. The Rant had a man crush on the entire Iranian team. Ronaldo is simply an angelic being sent … Continued


Stop wondering child Dreaming is a waste of time Just learn to exist Stop eating fat ass You make me uncomfortable Go somewhere and hide Stop pretending girl Who said you are beautiful? They tell truthful lies Stop running dear … Continued

Renea 5:16

for my late mother   confess                       WE                                  the your              … Continued